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Archive for the ‘Religion’ Category


Percy Was Brilliant, But Mary Is Relevant

February 6th, 2011 by Juan Zapatero

Excerpts from ‘Percy Was Brilliant, But Mary Is Relevant’
As marvelous as it was that the day came when we had our first Catholic President, and later, our first Black President, two very gifted men, (and in between their times we had our first president who smoked pot but didn’t inhale, and our first president who fought with a killer rabbit) the day will surely come when we will have our first woman president, and, if we are at once as a voting people perspicacious and fortunate she will have some…
This will all happen if time and change (forgive the redundancy) happen in a sort of plodding arithmetically sequential way…
…It is likely that we may have our first non-humanly conceived president, and perhaps even a non-human president before some of the other possibilities…
…I don’t know that the framers of the Constitution and the authors of the early American historical documents were so wise as to indicate that a President had to be human…
…Let’s suppose that the machine of man’s alleged design, whether it’s biological or mechanical, is able to quickly perform tasks, engage in discussions, quip, tell jokes, respond in a manner that appears to be emotional, will we believe that It is human?

Posted in Humor, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (4)


Search of Algorithms

December 19th, 2010 by John P. Schumake

Excerpts and Outtakes from “Search of Algorithms” by John P. Schumake

What is love?

I felt sorry for Harry Reid, trying to put his arm around Nancy Pelosi as she edges away from him. What is it about Nancy that excites Harry? The soft rustle of her depends-under-garments?

Our lives, if you look down the long road, perhaps standing at its crest, can be seen to have a sort of algorithm.

Be careful if you decide to try this, but if you stand ever so close to the highest point at the furthest distance from the beginning of your own journey, the algorithm will begin to be visibly apparent…
…They provided me with the greatest comfort and peace while I was journeying through them, but from where I now stand, they are not as interesting as some of the stopping points, the points that caused me to veer from the journey, the places where I had to shift directions, transform to a different means of travel, or simply wait…

Posted in Religion, Social Issues | Comments (1)


Shareholder’s Meeting

December 4th, 2010 by Juan Zapatero

Excerpts from Shareholder’s Meeting by Juan Zapatero

My thoughts go immediately back to Jimmy Stewart in It’s a Wonderful Life in that famous scene where he is confronting the angry shareholders, “I don’t have all of your money right here in this building, why, why Tom, that’s your money in Bert’s House, and Ernie, That’s your money in Iran’s Nuclear Reactor, Don’t ya see?…”

Posted in Humor, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (0)


The Connect

October 2nd, 2010 by John P. Schumake

Excerpts from ‘The Connect’

In all things, there is an eternal, powerful, fast-flowing, yet changeless origin of all lights that answers to the empty echo of the ‘not-even-nothingness’, ‘not even Null’ of that ‘not even emptiness’ that preceded ‘ the Big Bang’ or whatever that imagined inception was, with a small, still, “I am Here,” and yes, “I know your pain.” …
…It was the pain that an incredibly deep and powerful soul feels, a soul whose depth and power is oceanic compared to the average creature…
…Empathy, in short, only comes from pain. This is not to say that the current caviar class who formed their power-base on the backs of the poor, pretending to care for the poor, have absolutely no idea what pain is like, but if they did… well, they have forgotten…

There are grass roots candidates vying for major positions, such as Joe Miller, the extremely articulate West Point Graduate who is running for Senator in Alaska, Christine O’Donnell, (the latest person to be branded a witch from New England)

Posted in Religion, Social Issues | Comments (0)


The Catacombs

September 19th, 2010 by John P. Schumake

As engineers began to peer into the great recorded digital past, they began to make a startling discovery, a discovery that had long been masked because of the thorough expunging of any physical documentation or physical traces of that previous society…
…Traces of this reality appeared scrawled on the insides of code and old digital communications, the identities and allegiances of the authors varying.
…In an ostensible show at freedom, a freedom they (the Liberal elements) would never have equally accorded the traditional Conservative Christian elements of society, they appeared to welcome even more Stringent groups in an attempt to bolster voting blocks and garner support from new groups. ..
…They looked inside of ancient databases of social websites, some of which were still retrievable by resurrecting the great 3-Phi digital interpolator, sort of the Rosetta stone of early digital life and times in the now long receded 21st century…

Posted in Humor, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (2)


It’s Constitutional… No it’s not…. Yes, it is…

September 5th, 2010 by John P. Schumake

Excerpts from “It’s Constitutional… No it’s not… Yes, it is…”
There is quite a lot being said lately about what is one’s Constitutional Rights…
… Particularly with issues on the border with Mexico, Arizona’s current lawsuit involvement with the Federal government over immigration issues, and matters regarding the proposed ‘Ground Zero’ mosque…
…I have read books on C# with great relish, musing at the differences between this language and C++, so how hard could the Constitution be? …
…The Articles looked to me something like functions in a computer program. This first function provides you not only with the freedom of religion, but also the freedom of speech, and it’s logical that the two should go together. For, without the freedom of speech, you would certainly have no freedom of religion. …
…I found that I had to go back to the very opening words of the Constitution. Though seldom cited with specificity in courts of law the Preamble is often glossed over, and, from what I understand, rarely used in courts to support or argue against a matter, I must say to this that I believe that this will change as more technologically minded people begin to appreciate …
…wondering whether this right was retrieved by value or by reference once the function was executed…
I reflected for a moment that the very freedom that ostensibly gives one the right to build a building to practice a religion is the very same freedom that provides the opponents of this procedure with the right to speak in opposition…

Posted in History, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (2)


One More Time

August 29th, 2010 by John P. Schumake

Excerpts from ‘One More Time’ by John P. Schumake
It was an experiment where monkeys, or orangutans were placed in a chair and there was a device built into the chair that simulated the sudden impact of a collision from the rear of a car, and it generally resulted in breaking vertebrae of the orangutans. ..
…There was a court ruling this past Monday by Judge Royce Lambert, U.S. district Court, that will prohibit Federal Grant money for going to use in projects that result in the destruction of a human embryo. ..

Posted in History, Humor, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (0)


It Is the Best of Times, It Is the Worst of Times

August 15th, 2010 by Juan Zapatero

Picture a world where, if a thief comes to your place of business an electronic eye locks on him immediately, and a vertex of laser beams focused on his chest becomes immediately visible…
…The element of surprise has been turned around….
…weaponry like auto-responsive clothing that is able to address only the attacker with sharp invisible, yet painful barbs…
…Picture a world where no one tries to be politically correct. In this world everyone is initiated into society by a method practiced since ancient times…
…Picture a world where smaller social institutions, and inter-corporate affiliations, even guilds, if you will, become the defender of those abused by a drug infested gangs, because the large, lumbering government has become a slow and overstuffed dinosaur …

Who will restore hope and order? Thomas Jefferson? Eli Whitney? Andrew Carnegie perhaps, or maybe…
Madame DeFarge.

Posted in Humor, Religion, Social Issues | Comments (0)